A girl in my school died last night

Dylflon · 05-31-2004, 11:03 PM

May.31/2004

It's weird to think that someone that's the same age as you could die. Makes you think about mortality and how real the possibility of your own death is.

Last night a girl in mine and Typhoid's grade died from a brain tumor. I didn't know her all that well but it's still very unsettling.

It never really dawns on anyone how real the threat of death is. Any random moment could be your last. But not many people actually realise this. You don't take the fact that you're going to be dead someday seriously. Almost as if you think that you'll be the one person to defy science and never die.

She was only 16 or 17. That's probably the most disturbing thing about it. That's far too short of a lifetime.

I'm more determined now not to waste the set amount of time I have left. It's kind of funny how you take life for granted until someone you know dies.

Seth · 05-31-2004, 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dylflon

It's weird to think that someone that's the same age as you could die. Makes you think about mortality and how real the possibility of your own death is.

Last night a girl in mine and Typhoid's grade died from a brain tumor. I didn't know her all that well but it's still very unsettling.

It never really dawns on anyone how real the threat of death is. Any random moment could be your last. But not many people actually realise this. You don't take the fact that you're going to be dead someday seriously. Almost as if you think that you'll be the one person to defy science and never die.

I was talking to my friends about one of us dying. Statistically there is usually one or two kids who die every year or so. I consider the possibility pretty much daily. Whenever I get into my car I get a thought or two about it. We take everything for granted. I know a lot of good kids who have died from someone else driving while drunk. Freak accidents. Live everday like it's your last. Easy to quim. Hard to actually impliment into everyday life.

Quote:

I'm more determined now not to waste the set amount of time I have left. It's kind of funny how you take life for granted until someone you know dies.

Find something to remind yourself regularely...otherwise this lesson will be overshadowed by other stuff.

edit: It's also stuff like this that makes you reflect about how you take the people around you for granted. There are chances everyday where you can talk to people who could very well turn out to be a great friend. Instead we just mind our own business. I see it while on the city bus quite a bit. Everyone just stares in one spot without talking. shame.

Typhoid · 06-01-2004, 12:50 AM

I dont want to be captain bringdown here. Yes it is very unsettleing, but it doesnt concern me, so im not upset.

Today on MSN i was talking to this girl, and she asked me if i was sad, i said "no" and she yelled at me for not showing compassion. But then shouldnt i be sad every day? People die all the time, i dont know the people, just as i dont know her, so it doesnt change my life in any way, shape or form. Im not going to consult people about it, because i dont know her, and i have never even heard her name before today. At least one of my friends backs me up on this.

(And im not really cold and heartless)

People are liked more in death than in life, generally. This girl had nobody talking about her the weeks prior to her death, nobody was saying " Oh she'll die soon" yes it is a grim thing to think of, but its reality, but now that shes gone, everyone is saying things nice about her.

And like i said, i didn't know her, so that may seem why im acting like an ass, so to me, its as if a random person that some of the people i know died.

And saying " Its too short for a lifetime" makes it sound like ( to me) that she was murdered or something, hit by a car, poisoned. When she had a tumor, a natural defect. Maybe ( for those of you who believe in him) God had a better plan for her? Or maybe she sold her soul in a twisted poker game.

But im not trying to be a complete ass, so i'll stop my rant now.

R.I.P.

GameMaster · 06-01-2004, 12:56 AM

Sorry to hear that Dylflon.

I'm glad it's refreshed your sense of appreciation for how precious life truly is though. Don't let it scare you, just try to enjoy it more.

Dylflon · 06-01-2004, 01:17 AM

Typhoid, the means of her death doesn't change the fact that she lived a very short life.

Dyne · 06-01-2004, 01:24 AM

I heard about it too. I didn't know her either. It's just like 9/11, you have to try to show some emotion to help console people.. =\

Typhoid · 06-01-2004, 01:27 AM

Im not saying i didnt, show compassion, but its hard to, because you dont really know what the person is going through. Then i get yelled at for not knowing her and not crying. Stupid emotinal cycle of girls.

Look, im not saying im not a little distraught(sp?) about it, but im not going to go any lenght to condone or console her family, because i dont know them well enough. It IMO would kind of be like jumping on a bandwagon, you dont know the person, but you want to fit in, so you act really sad.Still is a shame that she died, but at least she died next to her friends and family.

Stonecutter · 06-01-2004, 01:50 AM

That really sucks.

I know what you're going through though, when I was in 8th grade, a 2nd grader at my school died of cancer.

Really, really sucks when they're that young.

Vampyr · 06-01-2004, 03:42 AM

I understand where Typhoid is coming from. For a human, it's practically impossible to feel great sadness for someone you dont even know. The realistic fact is, no matter how much you deny it, one of the first things you think of is "glad it wasn't me". Most people feel very guilty and wrong when they think that, but what they dont understand is that almost everyone else thought the same thing.

What makes you a good person is that you DO feel guilty for thinking "glad it wasn't me". The sad thing is, the people who really shouldnt feel guilty always do, and the people who SHOULD feel guilt never do.

A student at my high school died earlier this year...it was very sad, but I didnt know the guy at all. I just knew his face. I felt very sorry for him, because his life was so short, and I felt very sorry for his family, especially his parents, but that was about it. I pitied them. I didn't cry, and I never felt the urge to cry. It made me realize that some of the things I was worrying over was kind of petty, but still, not a lot of emotion coming from me.

If he had been one of my best friends or a relative, things would have been a lot different. I would not have instantly, subconsiously thought "glad it wasn't me", because I realize that I would rather die than one of my family or very close friends.

But I didnt feel a lot of sadness. No great swelling of emotion, just pity. I pity the girl that died at your school, and I pity her family. To die so young is a tragedy.

But other than that, I'm not affected. I didnt know her, just like I didnt know the guy at my school.

Like typhoid said, i'm not cold or heartless, I'm just human, and unlike some people, I realize I'm human and that for me to feel great sadness for every person that dies, whether I know them or not, would be ludicrous. I would go insane or die from the stress.

I would go as far as to say that it annoys me, yes annoys, me when I see people crying or professing this great sadness and horrific feelings that they are having towards a person who died, when they dont even really know that person. If it was one of the persons friends or family, I wouldn't mind at all. In fact, I would encourage them to cry and let out there emotions. But when I saw some of my peers who DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIM, but only knew his face, crying and professing this great sadness that they were feeling, it pricked my nerves. It just seems a little disrespectful somehow. You didnt care about that guy who died when he was alive, so dont start now. You are a little too late for that.

TheSlyMoogle · 06-01-2004, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vampyr

I understand where Typhoid is coming from. For a human, it's practically impossible to feel great sadness for someone you dont even know. The realistic fact is, no matter how much you deny it, one of the first things you think of is "glad it wasn't me". Most people feel very guilty and wrong when they think that, but what they dont understand is that almost everyone else thought the same thing.

What makes you a good person is that you DO feel guilty for thinking "glad it wasn't me". The sad thing is, the people who really shouldnt feel guilty always do, and the people who SHOULD feel guilt never do.

A student at my high school died earlier this year...it was very sad, but I didnt know the guy at all. I just knew his face. I felt very sorry for him, because his life was so short, and I felt very sorry for his family, especially his parents, but that was about it. I pitied them. I didn't cry, and I never felt the urge to cry. It made me realize that some of the things I was worrying over was kind of petty, but still, not a lot of emotion coming from me.

If he had been one of my best friends or a relative, things would have been a lot different. I would not have instantly, subconsiously thought "glad it wasn't me", because I realize that I would rather die than one of my family or very close friends.

But I didnt feel a lot of sadness. No great swelling of emotion, just pity. I pity the girl that died at your school, and I pity her family. To die so young is a tragedy.

But other than that, I'm not affected. I didnt know her, just like I didnt know the guy at my school.

Like typhoid said, i'm not cold or heartless, I'm just human, and unlike some people, I realize I'm human and that for me to feel great sadness for every person that dies, whether I know them or not, would be ludicrous. I would go insane or die from the stress.

I would go as far as to say that it annoys me, yes annoys, me when I see people crying or professing this great sadness and horrific feelings that they are having towards a person who died, when they dont even really know that person. If it was one of the persons friends or family, I wouldn't mind at all. In fact, I would encourage them to cry and let out there emotions. But when I saw some of my peers who DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIM, but only knew his face, crying and professing this great sadness that they were feeling, it pricked my nerves. It just seems a little disrespectful somehow. You didnt care about that guy who died when he was alive, so dont start now. You are a little too late for that.

I, on the other hand, was very close with this person. I had known him since I was in 1st grade. It was all disbelief until that next few days when I saw him lying in that coffin, and then later carrying that coffin to his grave. It was probably the saddest thing I've ever done. It was weird too, because I hadn't had to deal with any grief since my Grandfather died when I was seven.

Anyway, it didn't so much piss me off that some of the senior class members were in places, those who didn't know him, it pissed me off when certain people who made fun of him all the time, or weren't really his friend, when those people were hanging around and crying and saying how much they would miss him.

It also pisses me off when people, like this one sophomore, said awful things about him. This kid didn't even know him.

Graduation also ticked me off because they didn't say anything for him, anything at all, they just had a table with a picture on it. So after they announced for everyone to clap for us we chanted his name.

The death of anyone is sad. Though I don't see the need for anyone to cry unless they feel like it, so maybe those girls feel the need to cry. That's okay.

It doesn't make you a bad person if you don't grieve even if you know the person. What makes you a bad person is if you start saying bad things about a person in his death, if you didn't know that person.

And if you hated them, they're dead and you're not, so that's the ultimate burn. Don't say bad things about people in their death. It just pisses people off!

Dylflon · 06-01-2004, 07:41 PM

Contrary to what Typhoid was saying to me ("Why were you so sad? You didn't know her.")

I wasn't sad. This was just a sudden reminder about how swift death can claim you.I was more disturbed than saddened.

Don't pick apart my blog by telling me I'm thinking something I shouldn't be or assuming I mean something that I don't. These are my personal thoughts. Not yours.

Typhoid · 06-01-2004, 08:48 PM

Come to think of it, alot of people( In perspective) have died from our school this year. Theres this girl, a guy died the other day on prom night. Someone hit him accidentally with a car. A guy and his buddies got in a car accident and hes the only one who died.

Theres a few more, but i dont know the specifics of them, so i dont want to say.