Poetry

Ace195 · 10-08-2003, 10:37 PM

Alone in the world I was lost without light,
Somewhere among the darkness was a glint of light,
There you stand with your beautiful smile,
A princess amongst hags to beseech me all the while,
I love you with every hint of my being,
And without you I am lost without meaning.

So to my love I say this,
Stay for ever and keep me in bliss,
For without you I am nothing
Except for a man,
But I become a superhero when I touch your hand,
But for now I say adieu and farewell when we meet again
Upon our love we will dwell.

Here is something I wrote because my girlfriend wanted a poem. Tell me what you think. It doesn't really matter I already sent it to her. If you want to read my other poetry then go.
Fallin' For You
Trying to Breath

Vampyr · 10-10-2003, 08:46 PM

I didnt take the time to click on your other two, but I will someday. The one in your post was great, I really liked it. Very sweet. Good work. Your a great poet. Here is one of mine, enjoy: (keep in mind that I am a story teller/writer I am much better at stories.

Rednuth Mrots
By: Zak

The ground swam with a gaseous solid,
It was smoky in form,
But solid in power,
It showcased itself to its full potential,
Its body was a black and purple enigma,
Swirling, bulging, contracting, exploding.

It morphed to its full size,
miles in length,
The sky above trembled in fear,
The Rednuth Mrots could rip it apart.

Its rain was like bullets,
Fast and furious,
explosive and accurate,
The Rednuth Mrots released its daggers from its smoky sheath,
The rain flew up,
Each drop a kamikaze liquid,
The Rednuth Mrots could rip the sky apart.

They sky was full of holes,
The rain had done its job,
Wounded its prey,
The Rednuth Mrots gathered its atoms for a brutal attack,
The subatomic particles switched in a blazing frenzy,
One bolt was prepared,
One bolt was enough,
The lighting erupted from its masters eyes,
Diving up with all the speed light had gifted it,
As it surged toward the sky, it ripped the air apart,
But the air was relentless,
It would not so easily give way, and it struggled to hold on,
But the Rednuth Mrots was too powerful,
And the Lightning broke through,
Cutting a gash in the sky,
The Rednuth Mrots could rip the sky apart.

When the air was shattered,
It flew off into oblivion,
Its quaking atoms still residing in the space,
Each atom released its dieing scream into the night,
A scream the Rednuth Mrots enjoyed,
A scream known as thunder.
The thunder had no power in itself,
It could only roll,
Roll into the black void that was the Rednuth Mrots,
The Rednuth Mrots cradled the thunder, Magnifying it and echoing it within itself,
Giving the Rednuth Mrots a voice that spoke fear,
The Rednuth Mrots could rip the sky apart.
Rip the sky apart...

Ace195 · 10-11-2003, 12:33 PM

Thanks for the feedback. I really enjoyed your poem/short story

Rndm_Perfection · 10-11-2003, 01:00 PM

Wooogh, poetry!

The following are two projects for my English class yesteryear. The first is "freestyle", I suppose... but the second is an Emily Dickinson-esque poem. Therefor it'd need a little interperetation O_o.

P.S. My Valkyrie poem had a wee bit controversy at first. The teacher insisted that it was not my own work O_o. I think it's because I spruced it up with graphic design.

Vampyr · 10-11-2003, 01:21 PM

I laughed, I cried!

Random Perfection, two thumbs up!

Dylflon · 10-14-2003, 05:17 PM

I wrote a poem for my english 10 class last year. I got 12 out of 10 on it. Then for fun I submitted it into a poetry contest. I'm now published in two poetry books and one 3 disk CD-ROM set. If they keep using it I might get a cash prize. I think the top prize is $10,000 and then there's some $1,000 prizes.

I didn't even think it was all that good.

Dark Eyes
By: Dylan Innes

Nervous silence,
Shaky hands,
Blue Pills,
Dark eyes.

Dry mouth,
Forced swallow,
Uneasy feeling,
Dark eyes.

Mind racing,
Cold sweat,
Spinning room,
Dark eyes.

Pounding head,
Distorted vision,
Numb skin,
Dark eyes.

Heart pounding,
Silent screaming,
Blank stare,
Dark eyes.

Rndm_Perfection · 10-14-2003, 05:20 PM

While it may be basic, Dylflon, it invokes some pretty intense feelings. As well, the poetry guys probably like it because it's a teen's work, and thye want to show the "deep themes of angst and suicide" that a teen thinks about these days.

You could've wrote simply about shooting cats, and they maaay have published it. But this... this is a bit much more, as it managed to capture the "teen suicide" feel. Well done.

Ace195 · 10-14-2003, 05:21 PM

Umm.. It's not bad at all.. your talking about the same site mine's posted on :P.. Yeah don't count on any prizes. I won some dead poetry society award for trying to breathe and I still haven't recieved it.

Dylflon · 10-14-2003, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ace195

Umm.. It's not bad at all.. your talking about the same site mine's posted on :P.. Yeah don't count on any prizes. I won some dead poetry society award for trying to breathe and I still haven't recieved it.

I'm not expecting anything.

I figured it was a scam. Heh.

Shadow_Link · 10-14-2003, 06:39 PM

Some great stuff guys. Rndm_Perfection, would it be possible for you to post your "My Valkyrie poem" in a different font? It'll be easier on the reading eyes

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