Almost all of us will die on 2012

Jonbo298 · 06-28-2002, 09:19 PM

Engineer Predicts 35-Year Epidemic Of Dead Babies

BOCA RATON, Fla. (Wireless Flash) -- 2012 is turning out to be a bad year -- and it hasn't even happened yet.
Retired engineer Joseph Noah claims he has proof that in 2012, a huge nuclear holocaust will occur when seven meteors hit Earth.

Noah claims he made his shocking discovery by counting every fourth letter in the Bible for a new book "Future Prospects Of The Word" (New Paradigm).

According to Noah's cracked code, the meteor crashes will create a nuclear chain reaction that results in the deaths of all but 144,000 Earthlings.

Even worse: He says all babies will be born dead for 35 years to punish the species for abortion.

If you want to survive Armageddon, start feeling blue because people with blue auras will be able to absorb protective radiation pulses from a super nova 160,000 light years away for Earth.

http://www.ncbuy.com/news/wireless_n...2I8N6512020627

All I got to say is this is some weird $hit! But I can be certain its false. Although, its only ten years away

Jonbo298 · 06-28-2002, 09:24 PM

Vatican Sitting On Time Machine?

BOCA RATON, Fla. (Wireless Flash) -- First, the Vatican was accused of hiding the records of priests who've abused kids. Now, it's being accused of hiding a time machine.
The machine in question is called a "Chronovisor" and was built in the 1950s by a Benedictine monk named Father Pellegrino Ernetti.

No photos of the Chronovisor exist, but paranormal journalist John Chambers says Ernetti reportedly used the "way back machine" to film Christ's crucifixion for Vatican officials.

Ernetti died in 1994 without revealing the secret of the Chronovisor but Chambers says evidence is mounting that the Catholic Church is hiding a working model from the rest of the world, supposedly to keep it from getting into evil hands.

Sound crazy? Maybe, but there may be something to it. Chambers says a Jesuit priest named Father Francois Brune believes the Chronovisor must exist because -- in the priest's words -- "Ernetti wouldn't lie about such things."

Oh man, this is too funny.

GameKinG · 06-28-2002, 09:27 PM

This is why stupid people should go to jail with no reading material.

Happydude · 06-28-2002, 09:38 PM

hmmm...i kinda beleive the time machine theory...but not the meteor theory...first of all, priests arn't allowed to lie (as far as i know), second, there is a theory that states "the closer to the speed of light that you travel, the slower time gets, so if you travel at the speed of light, time stops"...it might been posible for him to find out how to travel faster then the speed of light

but then again, i'm very upset now, so i'm just talking BS...ohh well

Bond · 06-28-2002, 09:39 PM

This is hilarious.

BlueFire · 06-28-2002, 10:25 PM

Gee, Jonbo. It is nice of you to post a theory of our destruction.

Where exactly did you get this site?

Jin · 06-28-2002, 10:45 PM

::shrugs:: Well, if it happens, it happens. Until it does why should anyone worry about it? It's not like worrying about it is going to make the comet dissapear. Anyway, sounds like a bunch of bull, sort of like that whole Y2K prediction.

Btw, if the Vatican had a time machine(which they don't) Why can't they just go back and stop Adam and Eve from falling?

Happydude · 06-28-2002, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jin
::shrugs:: Well, if it happens, it happens. Until it does why should anyone worry about it? It's not like worrying about it is going to make the comet dissapear. Anyway, sounds like a bunch of bull, sort of like that whole Y2K prediction.

Btw, if the Vatican had a time machine(which they don't) Why can't they just go back and stop Adam and Eve from falling?

adam and eve fell?

lol...i dont know much about pre-historic history...

Jason1 · 06-28-2002, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by happydude666
first of all, priests arn't allowed to lie (as far as i know),

yea, and preists also arent allowed to sexually mollest young boys...

BlueFire · 06-28-2002, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jason1

yea, and preists also arent allowed to sexually mollest young boys...

Yep, here we go.

TheGrimReaper · 06-28-2002, 11:55 PM

That guy must be pretty pathetic if he spent his time looking at every fourth letter at the Bible, if this thing is actually true.

Joeiss · 06-28-2002, 11:56 PM

Hmm... Sounds like some freak just made some crazy stuff up. Meh, if it happens, at least most of us will be dead. And for 35 years all babies will be born dead? What ever hapenned to Jesus Christ, the forgiving God?

And yeah. Preist aren't allowed to lie.

My preist dresses up as Santa and gives presents to people. Damn liar.

Jin · 06-29-2002, 12:27 AM

People just take the bible so literally, and don't realize that half the stuff in there is in symbols/parabols. The world's not going to end if there's a God. That would be like a parent killing their child. He'll wait until we at least colonize on some other planet before letting a massive comet head towards earth.

Jonbo298 · 06-29-2002, 12:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by BLueFire
Gee, Jonbo. It is nice of you to post a theory of our destruction.

Where exactly did you get this site?

I got it from downloading a newer "Don't Touch My Computer 2" screensaver from download.com and the scrnsvr had a thing to where you could go to their site. So I did, and they had "Weird News" So I checked it out. I might post another story here and there if its hilarious enough.

Quote:

Originally posted by Joeiss
And for 35 years all babies will be born dead? What ever hapenned to Jesus Christ, the forgiving God?

Even worse: He says all babies will be born dead for 35 years to punish the species for abortion

Does that answer your question?

GameKinG · 06-29-2002, 12:49 AM

But why punish those who want a baby, and give those who dont want one relief? Somebody could just use that as an excuse.

"I wanted a baby, but...oh well...more tea?"

That kind of thing. I think it would kill all babies that are potential abortion doctors.