Tiger Woods, you so dirtay!

TheSlyMoogle · 03-18-2010, 08:56 PM

http://deadspin.com/5496451/joslyn-j...-sext-messages

I'm not hating on Tiger.

In fact I wish Tiger Woods would stand up and be like "You know what? What happened, it happened, it's over, and I just did what everyone else does these days and got caught, So fuck yall."

I also hope when he comes back he wins the shit out of golf tournaments (Or tours or whatever they are cause I don't give a shit about golf)

Now with that said, I cracked up so hard at this shit. Tiger Woods, you crazy.

My fave was:

Tiger:Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:
Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own

and also:

Tiger:Sent: 07:12 PM 09/07/2009:
No turkey unless it's a club sandwich

Solid Gold. This is better than Pat O'Brien and Bill O'Reilly.

Typhoid · 03-18-2010, 09:09 PM

I didn't read them all, but I really hope there's a "And I put on my wizard robe and hat..." in there.

TheSlyMoogle · 03-18-2010, 09:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Typhoid

I didn't read them all, but I really hope there's a "And I put on my wizard robe and hat..." in there.

If only.

KillerGremlin · 03-18-2010, 11:27 PM

Tiger:Sent: 07:12 PM 09/07/2009:
No turkey unless it's a club sandwich

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...=Club+Sandwich

Quote:

Club Sandwich:
Similar to a threesome but involves 5 people, 3 male and 2 female, in a stack arrangement that resembles a Club Sandwich. In order to hold the stack together one of the women must wear a strap-on otherwise known as the 'toothpick' in the sandwich.

In a sentence:
"Could my two friends and I interest you ladies in a Club Sandwich?"