"The Virus", part 2

Ginkasa · 09-14-2003, 07:57 PM

You and I seem to interpret superior differently... I was saying that I am superior in the sense that I am better than everyone... Ever.

That everybody should bow down to my superiorness.

But whatever, I died (the dumbest way imaginable) so...whatever...

...

Anyway, this was good. A few mistakes; punctuation and the like. You might want to spread the paragraphs out more. Make more, shorter ones.

Besides that its fine.

*shrugs and walks away*

Rndm_Perfection · 09-14-2003, 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ginkasa

You and I seem to interpret superior differently... I was saying that I am superior in the sense that I am better than everyone... Ever.

That everybody should bow down to my superiorness.

But whatever, I died (the dumbest way imaginable) so...whatever...

Quit yer whining you "fkucnig" pansy. *thanks the Cambridge study* ¦¬Þ

P.S. Excellent, Vampyr. Few characters have been involved thus far, but I suppose that's only natural in such a descriptive piece of work. I await the next installment.

Dylflon · 09-14-2003, 08:21 PM

Oh boy. That was sweet.

Change my word to compassionate.

Happydude · 09-14-2003, 10:22 PM

umm...i seem to be having problems finding the first part cause i forgot how it ended, can someone please give me a link, i dont want to read this part until i remember the first one.

ZebraRampage · 09-14-2003, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by happydude666

umm...i seem to be having problems finding the first part cause i forgot how it ended, can someone please give me a link, i dont want to read this part until i remember the first one.

Here's the link to the first part http://www.gametavern.net/forums/sho...6&page=1&pp=15

Also excellent job so far Vampyr.

Ace195 · 09-14-2003, 10:44 PM

Great part with jonbo and ginkasa.. Good story all in all..

Happydude · 09-14-2003, 10:51 PM

nice vampyr...but to tell you the truth i liked the first one more...it had a better ending

as for feedback and stuff...you should re-read it like once or twice to find mistakes, cause i found quite a few, dont feel like refering back to them now thouhg, but if you read it you'll see what im talkin bout.