The crap I write at 2:30 a.m. (post two hours later when I can't sleep)

[TheSlyMoogle]

Originally Posted by Ginkasa

doesn’t have any horse or protection or even food.

The only problem I have is you did that several times in your story. It's technically grammatically incorrect to do that, but some writers still do. I think it would sound better as:

"...doesn't have a horse, protection, or even any food."

Err... Just a suggestion.

Sorry, it's the evil school that made me do it!

Other than that, it was kinda cool. Nothing like death and destruction to start off my morning.

[Ginkasa]

Its dialogue. People don't talk grammatically correct. It's okay to just about anything wrong with dialogue if it's in character.

And it was 2:30


*shrugs and walks away*

[TheSlyMoogle]

Err this is true, except you did it in a section without dialogue too. Something about "didn't have neither a horse nor food nor protection.

Just saying...

[Ginkasa]

Originally Posted by Ginkasa

And it was 2:30

^_^


*shrugs and walks away*