Ask GameTavern

[Neo]

Dear Preggo,

While it's true that having a baby at 44 is slightly disturbing, that in no way proves she did it just to spite you. Especially since you gave no indication she got pregnant only after hearing about your pregnancy. Maybe she's just a gross and trashy person. And by extension, that means her son (your husband) is probably a piece of trash too. Since trash marries trash, you are the trashiest of them all. You and your mother-in-law would do us all a huge favor if you made up by bonding over your dual abortions. No one needs to pump out one child for every dog they own.

[KillerGremlin]

My mother-in-law is driving me crazy. My husband and I just found out that we are pregnant with our second child, and I heard she’s pregnant, too. I cannot conceive of being pregnant at the same time as my mother-in-law! She has this notion that she is “too young” to be a grandma, and I am so angry with her for trying to take my spotlight. She is 44 years old, and it makes me upset that she wants to have children now (after already having three of her own) instead of just being a grandma. What should I do or say when she reveals her big news to us, which will likely happen when we reveal our big news to her?

This person strikes me as being the type who has kids not because she wants a family, but because she likes the attention and likes to be in the spotlight, and she also probably thinks it is expected of her to make babies. Since I'm answering an editorial and not counseling this person, I would say I feel sorry for her egotistical, empty life. My serious response would be to go get therapy or get a job or find something worth living for, but Xantar is good at posting the responses....sssoooooooo I'll echo the theme in this thread...which is get a spot booked on Springer, and duke it out with your mother-in-law in a fist-fighting brawl that will result in clothes being torn off, and large guts flopping around. And perhaps we can throw in a midget for good measure too.

[Xantar]

So the actual response was basically "get over yourself" and "babies aren't for show. They are life." However, this particular advice column had a comments section, and my favorite response to the mother was, "Since your mother has obviously done this to spite you, there's clearly no point in having a baby any more. Just abort it and move on."

Neo is mean...

New letter!

Dear GameTavern,

I am an avid gamer, with my major form of recreation and relaxation being playing online role-playing games. My husband prefers TV. Our "unwind" time is spent doing our respective favorite things, and we also have "together" time that may be spent talking, touching, or doing any of the other things married people might find to do.

Inside the game, I have lots of friends. Occasionally the role-playing can turn frankly erotic. I enjoy this, and it tends to stoke the fires. When the computer is shut down, my spouse gets the benefit of the activity in bed.

I have no emotional connection with any of the online players. My spouse is getting all the physical action. But I worry ... am I cheating?

[BreakABone]

I don't think its necessarily cheating unless you are forming a relationship with the same partner over and over again.

But honestly, as long as it remains playful words and nothing else, I don't see the problem.

Though odd role reversal.

[magus113]

Does the husband know would be the thing I'd be worried about. Some people find that interesting, but as long as it doesn't bleed into the marital life I guess it's okay?

It's kinda different when you get into a relationship or mess around with someone that isn't physically there.

[Angrist]

Dear girl-nerd,

Should you be asking GameTavern or your husband? The fact that you didn't tell him, probably means you have something to hide.
There are many cases of (sometimes married) people meeting other players in real life. This shows that the virtual nature of the flirting is no guaranteed protection. Would you want to risk the relation with your husband for some quick flirts on your computer?
My advice is to either stop flirting, or talk about it with the man. And discover the joy it can give to share a hobby.

Love,
GameTavern's Angrist.

[Professor S]

No, you are not cheating. In fact, an active fantasy life is very important in any long term relationship. By the way, my WoW avatar's name is Grimaldi. Look me up sometime...

[The Germanator]

Yeah, I don't have a problem with that. If you're fantasizing about giving some online Orc a BJ while literally giving your husband a BJ, I feel like there's no downside there.

[Neo]

Dear GameTavern,

I am an avid gamer, with my major form of recreation and relaxation being playing online role-playing games. My husband prefers TV. Our "unwind" time is spent doing our respective favorite things, and we also have "together" time that may be spent talking, touching, or doing any of the other things married people might find to do.

Inside the game, I have lots of friends. Occasionally the role-playing can turn frankly erotic. I enjoy this, and it tends to stoke the fires. When the computer is shut down, my spouse gets the benefit of the activity in bed.

I have no emotional connection with any of the online players. My spouse is getting all the physical action. But I worry ... am I cheating?

Edit: I just realized I have your sexes reversed. No matter, you are still a freak.

Dear Cyber Whore,

You are lying to yourself if you think you have no emotional connection to the avatars you digitally fornicate with. Kittyclaw3812 may have an enticing, voluptuous and well-proportioned bosom, by there is a real person behind those pornographic pixels which have been getting your e-juices flowing. Plus, he is probably a 40-year old named Fred and is sitting in a windowless room in his boxers while wearing dark socks.

How would you feel if your wife could only become aroused by going online and finger popping herself to images of a bare-chested night elf doing the macarena? One being controlled by a 15-year old boy with severe acne?

Also, he is drooling.

So yes, you are cheating. The very fact that you feel guilty should have clued you into this. Though, I can understand if the eye strain induced from playing games on your semen-encrusted monitor has addled your already worthless brain.

You need to talk to your wife about this ASAP. Hey you never know, she might be into it. And if so, then more power to you. But until that time, try to maintain mastery over your domain before your seemingly innocent rendezvouses in Shadowmoon Valley spiral out of control and you end up spending your virtual gold on a virtual ring for your virtual wedding, while other loser paladins cast consecrate while jerking off to a Victoria's Secret catalog.


Freak.