Embarrassing Boner Moments [Archive]

ZebraRampage

04-28-2009, 11:39 AM

Okay, so BaB wants everyone's story about embarrassing boner moments so he replenish his lack of material to fantasize to.

I'll add one when I think of one.

KillerGremlin

04-28-2009, 11:42 AM

BaB also asked me about my erect penis.

My last embarrassing boner moment was on Easter...woke up around 8am and hopped in the car to go to church. Of course I got the wood of morning, and had to conceal that lethal weapon as I exited the car to walk into church with my family.

It was 8am! I wasn't even awake enough to be thinking about boobies...and on Easter...forgive me Lord! :lolz:

ryu823

04-28-2009, 12:54 PM

It's ok KG, without morning wood you could lose your penis. The reason you get morning wood is because your body circulates blood throughout your body when you sleep, and a flaccid penis would just turn to scar tissue if that blood wasn't sent there. YAY for morning wood!

Dylflon

04-28-2009, 03:10 PM

One of my lady friends was sitting on my lap when my dingus decided to make its presence known.

I made an excuse of why I had to get up. But she knew. She didn't complain or get up herself though so...

thatmariolover

04-28-2009, 04:42 PM

One of my lady friends was sitting on my lap when my dingus decided to make its presence known.

I made an excuse of why I had to get up. But she knew. She didn't complain or get up herself though so...

I too had one of these 'oh oh' on the lap moments. She noticed as soon as I did and started laughing. But she never got up, and she still teases me about it to this day.

Ah well.

ZebraRampage

04-28-2009, 05:09 PM

I guess a classic example is when you're sitting in class and all of a sudden, Hello, why are you up right now? And the more you think about it, the harder it is for it to go back down.

BlueFire

04-28-2009, 05:12 PM

I guess a classic example is when you're sitting in class and all of a sudden, Hello, why are you up right now? And the more you think about it, the harder it is for it to go back down.

Ah.. the joyous days of middle school - junior high.

BreakABone

04-28-2009, 05:16 PM

I too had one of these 'oh oh' on the lap moments. She noticed as soon as I did and started laughing. But she never got up, and she still teases me about it to this day.

Ah well.

The boner preceded to last for another 2 hours. ;)

Typhoid

04-28-2009, 05:41 PM

One of my lady friends was sitting on my lap when my dingus decided to make its presence known.

I made an excuse of why I had to get up. But she knew. She didn't complain or get up herself though so...

Maybe Elaine should know this.
Hmmm.
HMMMMM.:ohreilly:

But seriously, I can't think of any embarrassing penis moments. I remember once I had a public erection, and I wore that bad boy with pride.

thatmariolover

04-28-2009, 05:51 PM

The boner preceded to last for another 2 hours. ;)

Naw, probably a good 20 minutes or so though. Once she new she had me going she kept fidgeting. Women are cruel.

BreakABone

04-28-2009, 06:55 PM

Well, I er... finished doing some stuff and was going home afterwards.

Only to realize my fly wasn't up, and well I wear boxers.
Let's just be happy that no one was walking down the street before I er.. corrected myself.

Dylflon

04-28-2009, 08:58 PM

Maybe Elaine should know this.
Hmmm.
HMMMMM.:ohreilly:

But seriously, I can't think of any embarrassing penis moments. I remember once I had a public erection, and I wore that bad boy with pride.

Actually, it happened a few months before I met Elaine.

Swan

04-28-2009, 09:03 PM

I remember when time I was having sex with this chick and some how I got a boner.

Boy, was my face red

Dylflon

04-28-2009, 09:05 PM

I remember when time I was having sex with this chick and some how I got a boner.

Boy, was my face red

Usually you only get boners when you see naked dudes.

Swan

04-28-2009, 09:08 PM

Usually you only get boners when you see naked dudes.

You would know, lover;)

Yoda9864

04-28-2009, 10:53 PM

I was in Cross Country in high school and sometimes on a run my girlfriend would pull me aside for some 'private time.' Little embarrassing trying to run with a third leg....

Jason1

04-29-2009, 12:31 PM

I actually had one just now. The looser my pants are the worse it is...

Combine 017

04-29-2009, 09:10 PM

I actually had one just now. The looser my pants are the worse it is...

So you were just sitting there going through GT and got a boner and you're embarrassed by it?

KillerGremlin

04-30-2009, 12:48 PM

So you were just sitting there going through GT and got a boner and you're embarrassed by it?

I do that to people....

Jason1

05-01-2009, 11:08 PM

Oh, well I guess I really wasn't embarrassed by it...I thought we were just talking about getting boners at random times...

A friend of mine died recently and there were a lot of sexy girls at the visitation looking fine...I got a boner there. Is that bad?

Nah, he is probably laughing about it from the grave...love you Brent RIP.

TheSlyMoogle

05-02-2009, 02:04 AM

So I didn't think I actually had one of these stories until today when someone happened to remind me of mine.

So I'm at work sending uh... Well sending some very intriguing text messages back and forth to my current boyfriend when I get a photo back. Well needless to say it got me a bit aroused.

So I went to the bathroom and took a photo to send back.

Now the boner wasn't embarrassing at the time because it was well hidden by the bulky brown apron we have to wear at cracker barrel.

Well a couple of months later I got a new phone and sold my old razr phone to someone who worked at cracker barrel. Well let's just say i'm an idiot and forgot to clear off all the files from my phone.

It got passed around at work and eventually one of the people who work there exclaims "Oh isn't that the bathroom at cracker barrel?" for a while everyone thought I was a sick fuck for getting a boner at the barrel.

Haha.

BlueFire

05-02-2009, 02:31 AM

So I didn't think I actually had one of these stories until today when someone happened to remind me of mine.

So I'm at work sending uh... Well sending some very intriguing text messages back and forth to my current boyfriend when I get a photo back. Well needless to say it got me a bit aroused.

So I went to the bathroom and took a photo to send back.

Now the boner wasn't embarrassing at the time because it was well hidden by the bulky brown apron we have to wear at cracker barrel.

Well a couple of months later I got a new phone and sold my old razr phone to someone who worked at cracker barrel. Well let's just say i'm an idiot and forgot to clear off all the files from my phone.

It got passed around at work and eventually one of the people who work there exclaims "Oh isn't that the bathroom at cracker barrel?" for a while everyone thought I was a sick fuck for getting a boner at the barrel.

Haha.

BlueFire likes this post.

BreakABone

05-02-2009, 02:33 AM

So you were just sitting there going through GT and got a boner and you're embarrassed by it?

I'm sure some people get turned on by my oh so elegant words.
What can I say.

Jonbo298

05-02-2009, 09:45 AM

Moogle, that was funny :lolz:

KillerGremlin

05-05-2009, 03:50 AM

I've gotten bored and sent suggestive text messages from work...ah, the blunders of sitting in an IT environment all day.....

High school was the worst. 9 periods, 7-hour days...the worst was the random gym class boner.

Does anyone here use the choke and kill technique where you pull the boner up to your stomach and choke it with the elastic part of your boxers or shorts so it dies?

Szymon

05-06-2009, 01:02 PM

I've gotten bored and sent suggestive text messages from work...ah, the blunders of sitting in an IT environment all day.....

High school was the worst. 9 periods, 7-hour days...the worst was the random gym class boner.

Does anyone here use the choke and kill technique where you pull the boner up to your stomach and choke it with the elastic part of your boxers or shorts so it dies?

Nope, weirdo.

KillerGremlin

05-07-2009, 02:34 AM

Nope, weirdo.

I'm not weird, look:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tuck+and+go

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Tuck%20and%20Fold

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tuck%20it%20up

TheSlyMoogle

05-07-2009, 08:40 PM

I normally just tuck it to one side and then stand up.

Szymon

05-11-2009, 01:36 PM

Grade 10 Math class. Hottest girl in the school IMO sat directly infront of me and always had a cute thong on. Nearly failed that class...

KillerGremlin

05-12-2009, 01:13 AM

Grade 10 Math class. Hottest girl in the school IMO sat directly infront of me and always had a cute thong on. Nearly failed that class...

Did you teach her that trigonometry?

Dylflon

05-12-2009, 06:28 AM

I remember when I worked at a dinner theatre I would think about sex most of the day because it was so god damn boring there.

I was by myself though (doing set-up) so it was open season on boner-having.

Szymon

05-21-2009, 05:00 PM

Did you teach her that trigonometry?

I used her legs at a right angle to teach her Pythagorean theory.