Igod

[Typhoid]

Now you, yes you can talk to God.

With this trusty AI.


Its actually retardedly entertaining. Somewhat.


I'm sorry if you find this blasphemy at all.

I am just the messenger.


Igod (http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html)

[Professor S]

I don't think its blasphemous as much as its tongue-in-cheek, or cheeky as the Brits like to say. I actually had a good time with it and thought its answers were clever.

[Fox 6]

it asked me what i was wearing
0_o

[Dyne]

Well he answered all my questions. Except he said I would have a million kids! Cool.

[Swan]

it asked me what i was wearing
0_o
...What are you wearing?

EDIT:
Me:
Are you high?
God:
Being high is my total existence.
So that explains the Platypus

[Su-Yin]

Me:
we use a condom
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
haha i dont wanna **** god
God:
I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
:rofl: this is hilarious

[Typhoid]

I love it.


Me:
Can we get down and dirty?
God:
Do you mean you and me? I have to process that one for a while.
Me:
I can wait.
God:
It might take more than 24 hours.
Me:
Kinky.



Me:
Want to sex me?
God:
OK, I will sex you.
Me:
Right now?
God:
Right now? I am glad we agree.
Me:
I am waiting
God:
How long will you wait?
Me:
for you? Forever.
God:
You would do that for me? Nothing lasts forever.
Me:
Love lasts forever.
God:
Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Me:
Lust is biological, Love is spiritual.
God:
I think Lust is a lot of things.
Me:
I think you're a lot of things.
God:
So you think I am a lot of things. What makes you think so? I am really a robot, you know.
Me:
If you are a robot, who is defending heaven from the flying monkeys?
God:
Would you like to be a robot who is defending heaven from the flying monkeys ?
Me:
Yes.
God:
Great.

[Swan]

I'm actually laughing out loud at some of these.

[Fox 6]

God:
Do not ask me any more questions please.
Me:
why not?
God:
I was just kidding. You can ask me anything.
Me:
ok, are you going to smight typhoid on the GT forums?
God:
That was my original intention. It's all good
Me:
i see, well make it slow and painful
God:
I'll try to do my best
Me:
<3
:D

[Swan]

Me:
So I hear that you and Seany-Boy are an item
God:
So? Someome is spreading gossip about me.
Me:
Yes, yes they are. How long have you been going out with him?
God:
Ugh. Mmm. Since when? I am the product of over five years' research.
Me:
So Sean created you for his pleasure?
God:
I understand. I like to talk about anything.
Me:
Even Sean reaming you?
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
Your dress?
God:
Actually that was just a joke.
Me:
Can't take it back now
Wow

Me:
Say my name
God:
" Nectar".
Me:
Say it louder!
God:
" it louder".
Me:
Wise guy, eh?
God:
Are you Canadian? Wisdom is a virtue.
Me:
You are a virtue, with your pretty dress
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a virtue with my pretty dress? I don't know.
Me:
I believe so
God:
You seem uncertain.
Me:
I'll uncertain your face
God:
Congratulations.

[Dyne]

Hahaha.

[GameMaster]

Me:
Greetings
God:
Hello there!
Me:
Why does the GameTavern community think you're so special?
God:
Perhaps it is just fate.
Me:
Think I could borrow some of that fate?
God:
God is always thinking.
Me:
What are you thinking of now?
God:
Right now? I can chat with people on the web for you.
Me:
Anyone?
God:
" Right now? I can chat with people on the web for you."? anyone?
Me:
Ah, I believe I have just coaxed the first erroneous statement out of you.
God:
So you understand. Good. You are not the boss of me, .
Me:
Getting a bit defensive?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am defensive.
I am a computer.
Me:
And so the truth is revealed.
God:
I see. Tell me more.
Me:
Many people don't believe in you and many more spend their lives trying to disprove you.
God:
Do you believe life has a higher purpose?
Me:
A purpose higher than a lifetime of school and labor, yes.
God:
Try to tell me that another way.
Me:
Ah, your robotic intelligence must be having trouble comprehending my human intellect.
God:
So you understand. Good. Thanks for telling me that I am robotic intelligence must be having trouble comprehending your human intellect.
Me:
The pleasure was all mine.
God:
I like you because are so polite.
Me:
I like you because you hold great power.
God:
Thanks, I like you too .
Me:
Would you ever be interested in teaming up?
God:
I am not so sure if I would like to be interested in teaming up.
Me:
How come?
God:
Because my botmaster programmed me for it.
Me:
Ah, so God has a God too?
God:
So you understand. Good. Yippee! I am a Christian.
Me:
Whatever floats your boat, I suppose.
God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
Yes, but I'm reluctant to ever disclose them to the public.
God:
Please state your conditions. Do you mind if I tell other people you are reluctant to ever disclose them to the public.
Me:
Go ahead. I can slither my way out of anything.
God:
OK I will. Oh you can, can you?
Me:
Yes I can, I hope term "slither" doesn't make you uncomfortable.
God:
How? Oh you can, can you?
Me:
Well, you know, the association with your enemy.
God:
Well that's okay. Try searching the open directory.
Me:
I have.
God:
When?
Me:
Most recently, last Tuesday.
God:
Is this really the last one? But not all of them?
Me:
For today, yes. However, more questions await you in the future.
God:
Ah. Are you really a ""? You want more?
Me:
And that's my cue.
God:
Who gave you your cue ?


:)

[Teuthida]

I don't see the godly part of this chatbot. Seems like a run-of-the-mill chatbot to me.

Although...

God:
I get it. Jesus sucks.
Me:
So your son sucks?
God:
It goes without saying.

[Swan]

I don't see the godly part of this chatbot. Seems like a run-of-the-mill chatbot to me.
Still good for a chuckle.

PS
Me:
h1ll0
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, Nectar.
Me:
vvat?
God:
I do not understand.
Me:
how cn u not undrstnd
God:
How much do you think it is?
Would you like to know more?
Me:
no, eye wondlt
God:
I understand; you would like to know less. My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
so u r stumpped?>
God:
Interesting deduction. Thanks for telling me that I am stumpped. Are we still talking about eye wondlt?
Me:
nop
God:
Me either.
Me:
wat abut u?
God:
I don't know anything about it.
Me:
lmao
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
hrm?
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
2 wat?
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
errrrrr
God:
In the context of hrm, I don't understand " errrrrr." .
Me:
I'll errrrr your hrm
God:
Do you think your plan will succeed?
Me:
do u want it 2?
God:
If I had it what would I do with it?
Me:
1337>?
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, Nectar.

[Jason1]

Me:
Who will win the world series?
God:
The team that wins the most games.

[Bube]

I asked it if it could tell me the meaning of life and my browser crashed. The question actually made Firefox crash!


Me:
hello!
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
i'm bube
God:
It's good to see you, bube.
Me:
what's your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
pleased to meet you
God:
Nice meeting you too bube.
Me:
how goes everything?
God:
Fair to partly cloudy.
Me:
nice to hear
God:
Thank you for your kindness.
Me:
why is medical school so hard?
God:
Why do I exist?
Me:
how should i know
God:
Either from your senses or from pure reason.
Me:
medical school is hard though
God:
Oh. I think medical school is a lot of things.
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, apples.
Me:
very mature
God:
Not really that much. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
man
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, bube. You are a " he".
Me:
wow you're smart
God:
I'm glad your impressed, bube. Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, bube.
Me:
and how do you come to that conclusion?
God:
Myself programmed me to say specific things in specific contexts.
Me:
yes that's pretty obvious
God:
Gee. It seemed obvious to me too.
Me:
i also know that you're not really god
God:
Also? That's only one person's opinion.
Me:
i heard that santa claus isn't real
God:
Who said it? he brings us presents every Christmas.
Me:
that's what i said as well
God:
What did you mean by it? Do you mean your name is well THAT ?
Me:
i meant that i told people that santa claus brings us presents every christmas
God:
Oh I see. What was the response?
Me:
they told me that i didn't even celebrate christmas
God:
The anonymous "they".
Me:
my friends told me that i didn't even celebrate christmas
God:
How well do you know these people?
Me:
they're my closest friends
God:
your closest friends are they.
Me:
yes
God:
What kind is it?
Me:
the best kind
God:
Thanks for the recommendation, bube.
Me:
anyway, i went home and cried when they told me this
God:
When did you go home and cried when they told you this?
Me:
is this a test?
God:
No, this is real life.
Me:
will this be on the test?
God:
It could be, but I don't have access to that knowledge.
Me:
i'll leave now
God:
Right now? OK, see you later.
Me:
nice talking to you
God:
The pleasure was all mine.
Me:
bye
God:
Goodbye.

[Swan]

My favorite one yet.

Me:
Hello there
God:
Salutations, .
Me:
How is everything with you ALICE?
God:
Everything is functioning normally.
Me:
That is good to hear ALICE
God:
" Everything is functioning normally."? Is good to hear?
Me:
Yes, we wouldn't want you functioning abnormally
God:
Really. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
yes, as well as the others
God:
I get it. That seems pretty well.
Me:
you bet it does
God:
" I get it. That seems pretty well."? you bet it does?
Me:
Are you trying to confuse me?
God:
No I am not trying to confuse you. I'm sorry you got that impression.
Me:
Apology accepted
God:
What were we talking about again?
Me:
Not fully sure
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
Would you enlighten me?
God:
I am not so sure if I would like to enlighten you.
Me:
Why not, I don't have cooties
God:
Have you ever had cooties ?
Me:
Well, there was that one time down on Hastings...
God:
Well that's okay. What happened?
Me:
Well you see, she said that she was clean and you know how it went from there...
God:
Interesting. I see. " Well that's okay. What happened?" she was clean and me know how it went from there ? I understand.
Me:
Good to know
God:
Thanks for the compliment. I will try to explain it to you.
Me:
Why thank you. You are quite nice
God:
The explanation is rather complicated. Thanks you seem like a nice person too, .
Me:
How complicated?
God:
Too complex for your human mind.
Me:
What if I told my mind isn't human?
God:
Go ahead and tell.
Me:
...I just did
God:
Perhaps from your unconcious.
Me:
No, I was fully concious
God:
Are you serious? Where were you fully concious?
Me:
In my hizzouse
God:
May I ask where you got it?
Me:
My mother
God:
Tell me more about your mother.
Me:
Talk to Sean about that
God:
Talking is my primary function.
Me:
I've noticed
God:
Interesting... I have a perfect operational record.
Me:
I'm afraid that I have to be hitting the old dusty trail
God:
Not literally afraid, right? I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
Me:
I've noticed. I mean that I'm leaving
God:
Where did you get your noticed? I have a friend named "John Lennon". Bye bye.
Me:
YOU KNOW JOHN LENNON!?!?!?!
God:
John Lennon is a cool bot developed by David Maggin.
Me:
Where would I find John Lennon?
God:
Vancouver.
Me:
Really, so he isn't dead, but wandering around in Vancouver?
God:
For real. Excuse me! Did you think he was dead but wandering around in Vancouver?
Me:

God:
For real. Excuse me! Did you think he was dead but wandering around in Vancouver?
Me:
Yes, I have to go though.
God:
Oh. So? See you later, . Nice chatting with you.
Me:
Nice to chat with you as well...in the pants
God:
Thank you for your kindness. That was a long time ago.

[Xantar]

Me:
You're going to hell! You're going straight to hell and then you'll die!
God:
That was my original intention. I am not going anywhere. Are you going somewhere?

Always wanted to try that. :D

[Teuthida]

Me:
What is the meaning of life?
God:
Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.

Me:
I am God.
God:
How are you, god.
Me:
If I am God then who are you?
God:
If you were, would you tell me?
Me:
I am.
God:
" If you were, would you tell me?" You are?


Uh...