Battle Royale Part4 - Page 2

Happydude · 08-28-2003, 11:45 PM

haha...joeiss is dead

Dyne · 08-29-2003, 01:36 AM

Good god, man.. I got an Uzi.

nWoCHRISnWo · 08-29-2003, 02:04 AM

If you're using much of what happened on the movie, I can tell who's gonna win already, and it would also mean Bluefire and TheGame are lovers. Ha...

Dylflon · 08-29-2003, 02:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nWoCHRISnWo

If you're using much of what happened on the movie, I can tell who's gonna win already, and it would also mean Bluefire and TheGame are lovers. Ha...

You wish.

Hero2 · 08-29-2003, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ominub

no im not

And hes probly not kidding. if hes mad enough hes taken out some small animals and, if hes really pissed, hes on his way to your house now

Dylflon · 08-29-2003, 04:54 PM

That's sad if he really did get mad.

Sad

Ginkasa · 08-29-2003, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dylflon

You don't know what you want. Your first complaint was you didn't know how everyone had died.

No, I was complaining that you told us all of the deaths in a list, but didn't tell us what happened. If you wanted us to know, at that point, who had died and who had not, you should have written it in the story instead of giving us a list. That's tons of story-telling that's wasted.

But then you were saying that you were wanting to add suspense by telling us who had died, but not telling us how they died. I was saying that you could add more suspense by not telling us everyone who had died and who's still out there hunting.

I'm not trying to tell you each little thing you should do with this. This si your story and you should write it how you want. I'm just trying to help you do that better.

I'm trying to give advice on how to improve, not demands to make this like I want.

*shrugs and walks away*

Dylflon · 08-30-2003, 02:56 PM

I'm running in circles trying to make you people happy. What do you want from me?

Ace195 · 08-30-2003, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hero2

And hes probly not kidding. if hes mad enough hes taken out some small animals and, if hes really pissed, hes on his way to your house now

....

Vampyr · 08-31-2003, 05:49 PM

*twidles his thumbs waiting for part 5*

Dylflon · 08-31-2003, 06:15 PM

Oh....sorry. I'll get right on that.

I've been really busy the last 2 days.

On Friday I went to see R.E.M.

great concert.

And yesterday I was having the last party before school starts. We played Soul Calibur 2 and F-ZeroGX. woo!

Ace195 · 08-31-2003, 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dylflon

I'm running in circles trying to make you people happy. What do you want from me?

Hmm.. Death has crossed my mind quite a few times but eh what ever you want to give. Donations ect

Vampyr · 08-31-2003, 06:22 PM

Quote:

Oh....sorry. I'll get right on that.

I've been really busy the last 2 days.

On Friday I went to see R.E.M.

great concert.

And yesterday I was having the last party before school starts. We played Soul Calibur 2 and F-ZeroGX. woo!

Before school starts....I remember when I used to enjoy that. Glad you had fun though! Dont worry to much about finishing, just make sure its as good as the ones youve been writing. Its interesting stuff.

Dylflon · 08-31-2003, 06:59 PM

Part 5 is a little on the short side.

But knowing I have a public to please, I'll try to make Part 6 twice as long.