Murphy’s Combat Laws

Angrist · 04-18-2002, 06:18 AM

1. You are not a superman.

2. If it’s stupid but works, it isn’t stupid.

3. Don’t look conspicuous-it draws fire.

4. When in doubt, empty your magazine.

5. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.

6. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

7. If your attack is going really well, it’s an ambush.

8. No plan survives the first contact intact.

9. All 5 second grenade fuses burn down in 3 seconds.

10. Try to look unimportant because the bad guys may be low on ammo.

11. If you are forward of your position, the artillery will fall short.

12. The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.

13. The important things are always simple.

14. The simple things are always hard.

15. The easy way is always mined.

16. If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.

17. When you have secured an area, don’t forget to tell the enemy.

18. Incoming fire has right of way.

19. Friendly fire isn’t.

20. If the enemy is in range-SO ARE YOU!

21. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.

22. Things that must be together to work, usually can’t be shipped together.

23. Radio’s will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.

24. Anything you do can get you shot-including doing nothing.

25. Tracers work both ways.

26. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

27. Make it tough for the enemy to get in and you can’t get out.

28. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take.

29. When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right.

30. Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.

31. Murphy was a grunt.

Ric · 04-18-2002, 10:23 AM

Ok... some of those are good, others have a little humour to them, and some are just plain crap. But still, I like this, where did you get it from????

Oh and who the hell is Murphy????

quiet mike · 04-18-2002, 11:09 AM

LOL that was good.

Was this really part Murphy's Laws or someone elses adaptation to war situation?

And give a link if you know place with more of them.

Zen · 04-18-2002, 11:12 AM

Last time I checked Murphy was that guy inside the Robocop suit and stuff....heh

Angrist · 04-18-2002, 01:02 PM

Isn't Murphy some... I dunno, someone told me a couple of days ago. At least it has something to do with stupidity.

It was in an e-mail from a friend, so I can't give a link.

Bube · 04-18-2002, 03:19 PM

Well, I don't know who Murphy is (I only know he has some weird laws) but those Combat Laws are from the Half-Life: Opposing Force game manual. I think there aren't any more. Let me check.

*********

Yup. That's it. All 31 of them in the manual. But there maybe more that haven't been listed there, if they are real.

gekko · 04-18-2002, 07:26 PM

I don't get this. If they want to make humorous laws, do it. Why do they have to try to mix it with ones that make sense? I can see if they want to be funny, but the way they're written, they almost seem serious.

Either make it funny, or real.

Angrist · 04-21-2002, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Bube
Well, I don't know who Murphy is (I only know he has some weird laws) but those Combat Laws are from the Half-Life: Opposing Force game manual. I think there aren't any more. Let me check.

*********

Yup. That's it. All 31 of them in the manual. But there maybe more that haven't been listed there, if they are real.

Huh?? That's weird...

Cyrax9 · 04-22-2002, 02:56 AM

these are good, I love the one that reads:
"Friendly fire ISN'T!", I'm glad someone realized that.

Unfortunalty my favorie law of combat wasn't in that game, this law was"If it moves,shoot it, if it dosen't move, Shoot it anyway!"

TheGrimReaper · 04-22-2002, 03:40 AM

21. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.

lol I find that hysterical.

Angrist · 04-22-2002, 07:17 AM

7. If your attack is going really well, it’s an ambush.
10. Try to look unimportant because the bad guys may be low on ammo.
15. The easy way is always mined.
23. Radio’s will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.

quiet mike · 04-22-2002, 09:16 AM

6. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
16. If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.
17. When you have secured an area, don’t forget to tell the enemy.
18. Incoming fire has right of way.
20. If the enemy is in range-SO ARE YOU!
26. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
27. Make it tough for the enemy to get in and you can’t get out.

These are the funniest ones. Made me laugh outloud in the Computers Lab at College.