[KillerGremlin]

I've been doing a lot of renters lately...lots of movies that I just didn't feel were worth the admission price in theaters.

Ted - This movie was dumb as hell, but it had a few hilarious moments...namely the darker kidnapping stuff. Seth MacFarlane isn't funny. I'm sorry. The glory days of Family Guy are long past...and the glue holding this crappy B-comedy together is Marky Mark and Mila Kunis. I laughed, it was cute...I have no desire to watch this again.

Also, Mila Kunis has come a long way since That 70's Show.


Savages - I don't get this movie...because it's awful. It's a movie about two "bros" who like to surf, live in Orange County, and smoke lots of weed. One happens to be a veteran who served in Afghanistan, the other is a peace-loving-Buddhist-douche bag. Somehow, they grow a massive marijuana empire, and the Mexican cartel tries to buy them up.

The movie centers around "Ophelia," played by Blake Lively. Apparently she is on the Disney Channel. Blake Lively is getting double-reamed and DPed by the two bros, although the movie only hints at it.

She gets kidnapped or something...and then shit happens. It's all violent but feels as limp as a tween drama. This shit has to be marketed for the 14-18 demographic.

There's ONE scene that's kind of creepy and cool...with Salma Hayek and Blake Lively...otherwise the rest largely drags. Benecio Del Toro is awesome, as always, but meh. Even he can't save this mess.

The biggest slap in the face (aside from the two bros...chica chica) is the ending. This movie has two endings: an okay ending, and a phoned in Hollywood ending.

My only question is: Oliver Stone, is this entire movie some REALLY meta satire? Is this just a giant "fuck you" to everyone? If so, then this movie is a brilliant farce.