[Xantar]

Warning: don't read all of these at one sitting. These quotes are best taken a few at a time. I suggest just reading one of the sections, then going away for a while and coming back to read another section when you need cheering up.

Stupidest Things Ever Said by Democrats

"I cook ocassionally just to see how easy women's work is."
--Tip O'Neill (representative from Massachusetts, 1953-1986)

"The Gulf War was like teenage sex. We got in too soon and out too soon."
--Tom Harkin (senator from Iowa, 1985-)

"I stay out of their way at Kmart."
--Willie Brown (mayor of San Francisco), 1996-), asked what he did to help the poor.

"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, D.C.

"I just have no firsthand experience."
--Al Gore, when asked whether today's young women are too promiscuous.

"The laws in this city are clearly racist. All laws are racist. The law of gravity is racist."
--Marion Barry (former mayor of Washington, DC)

Stupidest Things Ever Said by Republicans

"I'll hire blacks as long as they can do the cotton-pickin' job."
--Evan Mecham (governor of Arizona, 1987-1988)

"We're never said to the press that Clinton is a philandering, pot-smoking draft dodger."
--Mary Matalin (1992 Bush deputy campaign manager)

"The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make the unsafe."
--Frank Rizzo (mayor of Philadelphia, 1972-1980)

"Statistics show that teen pregnancy drops off significantly after age 25."
--Mary Anne Tebedo (Colorado state senator, 1989-)

"We have every mixture you can have. I have a woman, two Jews, and a cripple."
--James Watt (Secretary of the Interior, 1981-1983), describing an Interior Department advisory group.

Special Dan Quayle Section

[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle on the concept of a manned mission to Mars.

It's the best book I've certainly read. And he goes through it; he starts around the turn of the century up through Vietnam. And it's a very good historical book about history.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle on Paul Johnson's `Modern Times' (Playboy, 1/93)

May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world.
-- The Quayles' 1989 Christmas card.

Add one little bit on the end... Think of `potatoe', how's it spelled? You're right phonetically, but what else...? There ya go... all right!
-- Vice President Dan Quayle correcting a student's correct spelling of the word `potato' during a spelling bee at an elementary school in Trenton.

I should have caught the mistake on that spelling bee card. But as Mark Twain once said, `You should never trust a man who has only one way to spell a word'.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, actually quoting from President Andrew Jackson.

I should have remembered that was Andrew Jackson who said that, since he got his nickname `Stonewall' by vetoing bills passed by Congress.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle, confusing Andrew Jackson with Confederate General Thomas J. `Stonewall' Jackson, who actually got his nickname at the first Battle of Bull Run.

We don't want to go back to tomorrow, we want to go forward.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle

I have made good judgments in the Past.
I have made good judgments in the Future.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle

More Dan Quayle goodness to come in this topic

Special Yogi Berra Section

"It ain't over 'til it's over "

"Never answer an anonymous letter"

" I usually take a two hour nap from one to four"

" It's deja vu all over again"

" When you come to a fork in the road....Take it "

" I didn't really say everything I said "

" You can observe a lot by watching "

When asked what time is was......" you mean now?"

At Yogi Berra day in St Louis 1947 " I want to thank you for making this day necessary"

" If the world were perfect, it wouldn't be "

Yogi on the 1969 NY Mets....." overwhelming underdogs "

" If the people don't want to come out to the ballpark, nobody's going to stop them "

On why NY lost the 1960 series to Pittsburgh " We made to many wrong mistakes"

" The future ain't what it used to be "

" It gets late early out here"