Haha, you know why this wouldn't sell? Because it would be way too expensive. Cell phone (which you should really pay for, or else it rules out the whole machine altogether), and monthly bills. Ouch. Well, I'm sure some people would be interested in it, but, whatever.
BTW, I'd rather have this phone. This phone rocks.
http://nokia.com/nokia/0,5184,815,00.html