[GameMaster]

All fun aside, the kart's that these character's are assigned to are so f---ing gimmicky that it almost makes me want to transfer my loyalty to another racing series.

Nothing says, "Fun" like racing with Princess Peach in her gender role specified pink kart! Or how about Luigi and his vacumn-mobile!!! Vroom-vroom! Because after all, the only time the character of Luigi was ever affiliated with a vacumn-like device was in a rather ****ty Gamecube launch title in 2001! If this doesn't satisfy your racing urges, go bananas with Donkey Kong is his Rhino-Racer! Cause I'll be damned if any animal is going to be allowed to drive in a vehicle that has even a shred of dignity and class! If being discriminated and treated like a second class citizen doesn't float your boat, choose Mario. Does Mario drive a FLUDD waterpack shaped kart? Nope. How about a mushroom or fire-flower since he's employed those items extensively throughout his career? Nope. Mario gets to drive the fastest, coolest looking, white kart which looks like a standard racing vehicle!