[Dylflon]

Dear Mr. Jonas,

In light of recent events (see article 13.2 "Dylan cutting his god damn hair" and article 17.6 "Crappy GT username change"), I feel I can no longer associate with you while maintaining a healthy level of self respect. Enclosed is a list of terms for our future transactions.

1. Mr. Jonas may never make direct eye contact with Mr. Innes.
2. If Mr. Jonas and Mr. Innes are walking together, Mr. Jonas must walk exactly ten paces behind Mr Innes.
3. The nickname "Inferior Dylan" is no longer allowed for use by Mr. Jonas.
4. Mr. Jonas' new nickname will from now on be "Stupidface McJackass".
5. No gay chicken, hand shakes, high fives, or physical contact of any kind.
6. If physical contact does occur, Mr. Jonas must wear gloves on his hands to protect those around him. If Mr. Jonas is unable to obtain gloves, ziploc brand plastic bags will suffice.
7. Grow back your hair, you son of a bitch.

Failure to meet these terms will result in a restraining order or possible gang shooting. For I have home boys, you see. They reside in the hood .

Sincerely,

Dylan Innes.