[thatmariolover]

Dear friends and fellow forum members,

I regret to inform you that I died today. At 5:14 AM this morning, I was forced to pass a kidney stone of the approximate mass of an Xbox. I actually managed to pass it, but unfortunately it led to further complications and I died of a heart attack 5 seconds after.

Now, some of you by now are probably thinking this post is a spoof. But I assure you, it’s true. I am dead.

Hopefully you can all come to my funeral reception which will be held in the Mushroom Kingdom Palace Guest Hall at 5:00 on the 19’th of this month. The actual funeral will preceed it just outside the fields of Hyrule by Lon Lon Ranch at 3:00. I think you will all understand the necessity of a closed casket, as my body has been left... Shall we say, disproportionately shaped.

I just thought you all should know. Please give me lots of sympathy. Thanks!

Your dead friend,

Eric