if you hate chain letters, you have to read this.
 

Hey. Long time since I've posted. Well here's a little something Gambit-X e-mail me (thank you). I'm warning, there is foul language..but I don't think you guys care. I haven't been here in forever though, so I don't know if anything has changed. So, if the language offends you..I'm sorry, but you have to read this. its funny. It's kind of lengthy, but it's worth it.



FINALLY A CHAIN LETTER THAT I LIKE!

Hello, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not forwarding out 50 billion fu**ing chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, then that poor f**king 6 year old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to the traveling freak show.

Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone you send his email to $1000? How stupid are you? Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by every Playboy Bunny in the magazine! What a bunch of f***ing bullsh*t

So basically, this message is a big F**** YOU to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards. Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by Ceaser in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.

F*** them!

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly fu**** amusing. I've seen all the 'send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a Nickel from some omniscient being forwards about 90 times. I don't ****ing care. Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out forwards. Chances are it's your own unpopularity.


THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:

Chain Letter Type 1:
(scroll down)


Make a wish!!!




Keep Scrolling



No, really, go on and make one!!!





Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!
Wish something else!!!





Not that, you pervert!!






STOP!!!!


Wasn't that fun? :)
Hope you made a great wish :)


Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will be raped by a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a pile of manure.

It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!! Really!!! Here's how it goes:

*Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.

*Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter.

*Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on your life.

*Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid chain letter and will napalm your house. Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!

Chain Letter Type 2

Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is a starving little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms, no legs, no parents, and no goats. This little boy's life could be saved, because for every time you pass this on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless Armless Goatless Boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund.

Oh, and remember, we have absolutely no way of counting the emails sent and this is all a complete load of bull****. So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47 seconds.

Oh, and a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you will die instantly.

Thanks again!!


Chain Letter Type 3

Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897. This is absolutely incredible because there was no email then and probably not as many sad pricks with nothing better to do.

So this is how it works... Pass this on to 15,067 people in the next 7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like:

*Bizarre Horror Story #1
Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She had recently received this letter and ignored it. She then tripped in a crack in the sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of poopie, and went flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she died. This Could Happen To You!!!

*Bizarre Horror Story #2
Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way). They both died and went to hell and were cursed to eat adorable kittens every day for eternity.

This Could Happen To You Too!!! Remember, you could end up just like Pinsley and Bip. Just send this letter to all of your loser friends, and everything will be okay.


Chain Letter Type 4

As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote.
Send it to all your friends.

FRIENDS:

A friend is someone who is always at your side.

A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of ****, and your breath smells like you've been eating catfood.

A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as a hat full of assholes.

A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself.

A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your sad, sad life.

A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really think you should be raped by mad goats, then thrown to vicious dogs.

A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English...no, sorry that's the cleaning lady.

A friend is NOT someone who sends you chain letters because he wants his wish of being rich to come true.

Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex ever again!


The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth, who's been tied to a dead elephant for 27 years, whose only savior is the 5 cents per
letter he'll receive if you forward this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Miranda. Right?


Now forward this to everyone that you know otherwise you'll find all your knickers missing tomorrow morning!

heh, that was good. But I don't get any of them chain letters anymore. If I do, it just goes to the trash. *For some reason, I have this feeling that this thread will get majorly off topic when more people reply:hmm:*

Ya, when I get chain letters I just delete them. But, I have read a few of them, so I know what they're like.

Right after I read this, I checked my Yahoo! Mail since nothing is happening at GT at the time of this typing and I got a chain letter, lol.

I want this back...good luck!

This may sound nuts, but Dennis got this the other day and sent it off
and about 10 minutes later a really good financial windfall happened
for his son Sean who he had sent it too as well. One of the people he
sent it to was responsible for the windfall. §AN IRISH FRIENDSHIP
WISH§ You had better send this back!!!!

Good Luck!! I hope it works... §May there always be work for your hands
to do; §May your purse always hold a coin or two; §May the sun always
shine on your windowpane; §May a rainbow be certain to follow each
rain; §May the hand of a friend always be near you; §May God fill your
heart with gladness to cheer you.

OK, this is what you have to do.... Send this to all of your friends!
But - you HAVE to send this within 1 hour from when you open it!

Now.................Make A wish!!!!!!

I hope you made your wish! Now then, if you send to: * 1 person ---
your wish will be granted in 1year * 3 people --- 6 months * 5 people
--
- 3 months * 6 people --- 1 month * 7 people --- 2 weeks * 8 people ---
1 week * 9 people --- 5 days *10 people --- 3 days *12 people --- 2
days *15 people --- 1 day *20 people --- 3 hours

If you delete this after you read it ... you will have 1 year of bad
luck! But... if you send it 2 of your friends ... you will
automatically have 3 years of good luck!!! :-)

lmao. see? the joke chain letter was funny, because if you have ever read chain letters, its just like the chain letters. I get chain letters all the time..they're so annoying.

lol...yeah...i got that one before...read it, then deleted...like all the other chain mails.

lol. Stupid chain letters. I haven't received one in so long though

Homosexuals sometimes email me that garbage...I just delete them...

I haven't gotten one in years. I thought they were fun though.

::Beats GameMaster with a stick:::)

Chain letters are so dumb. My basic rule of thumb is: All the messages that are forwarded to me, automatically go to the trash can.

:takes over the beating when yoda gets tired:

I despise chain letters. I think they may be a big reason that I don't like e-mail all that much. Now, I make people promise not to send me forwards or I don't give them my addy.

I get about 1 chain letter a day.:( I get a lot of the "if you're a true friend" type letters. And, I'm a christian so, I also get the "if you truly love god" ones. I use hotmail mostly so I get a few of the "make sure you forward this to atleast 10 people otherwise your hotmail account will be deleted due to lack of server space on behalf of Microsoft" Those piss me off because people that I thought had a bit of intelligents actually send them to 10+ people.
So, I haven't read a chain letter for a long time now. It's just a bunch of bull****. No one is ****ing going to give a kid with testicle cancer money for every forwarded email. If they're that generous why wait for a ****ty chain letter that pisses everyone off to circulate around. If they actually cared enough then they'd give the money for the damn operation then and there.

I hated ICQ for those stupid chain messages. :Puke:
"There is a new virus on the web! Forward this to all your friends!!" :mad:

Never got any chain mails the last years. I guess I have smart friends (and haha don't make the joke "you have no friends"). :)

you butthead
 

you butthead i sent you THAT~! *KICKS YA AND WALKS AWAY*

LOL
That's great!