A Business Plan Your Company Can Be Proud Of

[Bond]

I'm not sure how funny everyone else will find this, but I just watched the "Gnomes" South Park episode and found this part particularly hilarious, as I've made business plans in the past:

http://www.vfcbizplan.com/UGnomeBizPlan.png/UGnomeBizPlan-full.png

While it is funny because it's South Park, Gnomes, etc, you would be surprised as to how many business plans actually resemble the above one.

[Typhoid]

That is one of my favourite episodes of South Park.


"Hey, whats phase 2?!"
"Phase 3, Profit!"

[Ric]

:lol:

Can you imagine a business plan by George Bush it would go:

1.Drill Hole. 2. ??? 3. Make $$
or
1. Start War. 2. ??? 3. Get Oil

Here's the short video clip for the Gnome's business plan, unfortunatly embedding is disabled.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pe6kGJDGctU

[flamb]

step 1: cut hole in box

[KillerGremlin]

step 1: cut hole in box

This is the only good thing that came out of the meme. The south park episode is hilarious, and dick in a box is hilarious.

This is also older than the Internetz. I think I was in like 4th or 5th grade when that episode of South Park aired.

[Angrist]

I thought it was an old joke.

Like:
"Step 1: get on a boat and go to the French coast.
Step 3: conquer the German army and win the war."
"What's step 2?"

[Ric]

I thought it was an old joke.

Like:
"Step 1: get on a boat and go to the French coast.
Step 3: conquer the German army and win the war."
"What's step 2?"

Use Americas money, while most of them stay in England and fuck all the women, and the rest of europe kills the Germans. Then watch them step in at the last minute as Berlin is taken to claim the glory :lol:

[Professor S]

Use Americas money, while most of them stay in England and fuck all the women, and the rest of europe kills the Germans. Then watch them step in at the last minute as Berlin is taken to claim the glory :lol:

Honestly, I wouldn't care about revisionist history like this if it didn't absolutely dishonor the thousands of American lives that are currently in graves on European soil, 10,000 just at Normandy. Especially this close to memorial day.

http://battlefieldsww2.50megs.com/UScem01.JPG

Yes, I realize that Europe gave more lives of their own, but thats neither here nor there. Bottom line, without American intervention in the European theater during WW2, Britain would have likely fallen if only through attrition and Germany would have had a better than even chance of stabalizing in France, Italy and Greece. And lets not forget the financial aid and supplies that America donated before our military intervened. To deny this is ignorance or bold faced lie.

And Ric, this juvenile nationalism/anti-americanism you've been expressing of late doesn't become you. It's a bit embarrassing.

***

Now back to the topic at hand, are there any partcularly good businss plans that you can share, Bond? I'm interested in starting my own consultation firm, and I love to see some examples.

[Jonbo298]

It's definitely an "old" joke but had somewhat recent rejuvenation on the internet as a meme. Still funny when used right on engadget or other sites.

[Ric]

Honestly, I wouldn't care about revisionist history like this if it didn't absolutely dishonor the thousands of American lives that are currently in graves on European soil, 10,000 just at Normandy. Especially this close to memorial day.

http://battlefieldsww2.50megs.com/UScem01.JPG

Yes, I realize that Europe gave more lives of their own, but thats neither here nor there. Bottom line, without American intervention in the European theater during WW2, Britain would have likely fallen if only through attrition and Germany would have had a better than even chance of stabalizing in France, Italy and Greece. And lets not forget the financial aid and supplies that America donated before our military intervened. To deny this is ignorance or bold faced lie.

And Ric, this juvenile nationalism/anti-americanism you've been expressing of late doesn't become you. It's a bit embarrassing.

It was a joke aimed at the few europeans that post here actually. And it was also factual. Normandy was just one of 5 beaches attacked that day, it just so happens that, that was the one the americans landed at. Pure chance. If the Americans had landed at an 'empty' beach you would not have even mentioned it.

I said 'use americas money' that was the main thing that was needed and used it was. So I have denied nothing and lied about nothing. Thousand of US troops did indeed come to the UK and stay there till the end of the war. And dont get funny with me when I say the U.S claims the glory because you do.

I could say that what you call 'juvenile nationalism/anti-americanism' is possibly one of the mosy hypocritical things I have ever heard. Parhaps not on your behalf granted. But how often do we see Canada and canadians slated by americans on these boards? What it's ok for americans to take the piss out of people but not for anyone to take the piss out of americans, is that what you are saying.

[Professor S]

It was a joke aimed at the few europeans that post here actually. And it was also factual. Normandy was just one of 5 beaches attacked that day, it just so happens that, that was the one the americans landed at. Pure chance. If the Americans had landed at an 'empty' beach you would not have even mentioned it.

You say that as if the attack was not planned and the allies didn't know ahead of time what beaches were more heavily defended and harder to overcome. But in essence, you are correct, I only mentioned it because 10,000 died, but that doesn't take away from the fact that 10,000 died on European soil defending YOUR country's freedom, not theirs. I could have mentioned the thousands that parachuted in or landed at oher beaches. I could have mentioned Patton driving to Berlin. I could have mentioned how instrumental a small American force was in holding back the last gasp of the Nazi's during the battle of the bulge. Oh wait, I just mentioned all of these. :)

I said 'use americas money' that was the main thing that was needed and used it was. So I have denied nothing and lied about nothing. Thousand of US troops did indeed come to the UK and stay there till the end of the war. And dont get funny with me when I say the U.S claims the glory because you do.

Yes, and glory is deserved. Glory is also desreved for the French freedom fighters and the British that held out as long as they did. Celebrating accomplishments of the American military in WW2 does not deminish the accomplishments of others. Your snide remarks were an attempt to trivialize the American military's importance in the war, and that entire premise is false.

I could say that what you call 'juvenile nationalism/anti-americanism' is possibly one of the mosy hypocritical things I have ever heard. Parhaps not on your behalf granted. But how often do we see Canada and canadians slated by americans on these boards? What it's ok for americans to take the piss out of people but not for anyone to take the piss out of americans, is that what you are saying.

Quite honestly I don't see very much Canada-bashing on this forum, at least not in any way that is serious, and there is just as much if not more America bashing (your post as an example) so I dont really understand your argument. I also don't see how defending your offensive comments by refrerencing other supposed offensive comments makes them any more appropriate or historically accurate.

You can defend your statements all you like, but trying to dismiss the American involvement as you have: "the rest of europe kills the Germans. Then watch them step in at the last minute as Berlin is taken to claim the glory" is wholly and completely inaccurate, and given this time of the year, offensive.

You are simply wrong and rude at the basest of levels. You pissed on the memory of soldiers who died attempting to save your country. There is nothing redeeming about your comments from a historical or social perspective. If you prefer not to acknowledge that, I'll just chalk it up as a character flaw and we can move on.

[Typhoid]

Let's not get off topic here, fellas.

[Teuthida]

Yup, still relevant:
http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i290/teuthida/gametavernposter.jpg

[Ric]

Yup, still relevant:

:lol:

---------------------

I can not even be bothered to justify a joke. Especially one so wide spread and commonly shared across Europe. It's a joke, calm down ;) I will say that if you take offence where it was not intended then that's your problem, not mine. It should not be taken so literally ;)

As has been said I am not going to go off topic anymore so here goes, this ones slightly different, It's kinda relevant to where I am at right now.

Step One: Move To London
Step Two:
Step Three: Make ££££££'s

[Professor S]

:lol:

---------------------

I can not even be bothered to justify a joke. Especially one so wide spread and commonly shared across Europe. It's a joke, calm down ;) I will say that if you take offence where it was not intended then that's your problem, not mine. It should not be taken so literally ;)

Ok, we're just joking.

Here's my joke:
Europeans are nothing but a nation of whining, bloody vaginas who laid on their backs while Germany fucked them and would be polishing Nazi boots and cocks right now if it weren't for America saving their asses in WW2.

Hilarious, no? And hey, it's a joke all Americans share. If you take offense, it's your problem.

[Typhoid]

Now you're just being a really stereotypical dick, Strangler.

[BreakABone]

How did this thread take a turn for the serious?

[Typhoid]

How did this thread take a turn for the serious?

Well, someone made a well-known joke towards the United States, and Strangler seemed to take a 70 year old's stance of "If it wasn't for us, you'd be blowing Nazi's."


I think that's exactly how it got serious, really.

[BreakABone]

Well, someone made a well-known joke towards the United States, and Strangler seemed to take a 70 year old's stance of "If it wasn't for us, you'd be blowing Nazi's."


I think that's exactly how it got serious, really.

I don't get it, I know the Prof has a sense of humor, he shows as much when we play Xbox, so I don't know why this was taken so far.

And I guess how he feels its disrespectful to those who gave their life, but I mean most humor has some basis in tragedy.

Anyhow, I say we make GT t-shirts, then profit!

[Teuthida]

Anyhow, I say we make GT t-shirts, then profit!

What would go on a GT shirt? The three P's? Politics, Penises, and Platypuses?

[Professor S]

I find the reaction to my last post hilarious, quite honestly. All I did was basically make a similar "joke" on the same terms that Ric did, and somehow I'm the asshole and he was simply being humorous.

So why is it so acceptable to make jokes about WW2 at the expense of Americans, and not Europeans? Is that joke only funny when no one calls out the fact that it's premise is complete rubbish and offensive to Americans, especially those whose grandfathers carried scars from their service? And to make it two days after Memorial day? I really don't care if it's an old joke in Europe, it's then just an old, offensive joke.

And BTW, in case anyone couldn't tell, my last post about Europeans in WW2 was not a reflection of my true feelings (I stated them earlier), but me making what I thought was an obvious point about the absurdity of the entire premise of Ric's silly argument. Apparently not...

[Typhoid]

I find the reaction to my last post hilarious, quite honestly. All I did was basically make a similar "joke" on the same terms that Ric did, and somehow I'm the asshole and he was simply being humorous.

If you can't see this, then I'm ashamed for you.

The difference is Ric's was a joke. A common joke, especially in Great Britian. My brother-in-law is British. I have heard said jokes.

However, what you said, was out of spite - to mock his joke and try shove history in his face while insulting him as much as possible, while planning to back it up with a "What, it was just a joke" mentality. Even though it was clearly to A) get a rise, B) be a general asshole and/or C) You actually think that.

[Professor S]

If you can't see this, then I'm ashamed for you.

Once again, my comment was to make a point. A "joke" is a matter of perspective. Maybe Europeans find it hilarious, but I'm sure my late grandfather wouldn't, considering he carried a scar from his time in Europe until the day he died. He never talked about it either, and would get eerily silent any time WW2 was brought up.

So sure, your joke is just fine. I guess it's ok to diminish those who died for you two days after the holiday that is meant to remember them in the states.

Excuse me if I don't find that joke funny, and Europeans who do should be ashamed of themselves.

[Typhoid]

Once again, my comment was to make a point. A "joke" is a matter of perspective. Maybe Europeans find it hilarious, but I'm sure my late grandfather wouldn't, considering he carried a scar from his time in Europe until the day he died. He never talked about it either, and would get eerily silent any time WW2 was brought up.

So sure, your joke is just fine. I guess it's ok to diminish those who died for you two days after the holiday that is meant to remember them in the states.

Excuse me if I don't find that joke funny, and Europeans who do should be ashamed of themselves.



My joke?
When the hell did I post a joke.
Pick your words properly.

And yes, it's a matter of perspective.
Since you know it's all perspective, is there any reason to raise a giant stink over the internet about it?
This entire thread is accomplishing what?
Without posting around what I'm asking, just riddle me this:
What are your brash comments accomplishing?

It's like a guy yelling at his TV during a football game. The game will carry on with no account of what he says or doesnt say, yet he still keeps yelling at the TV.

[Professor S]

My joke?
When the hell did I post a joke.
Pick your words properly.

And yes, it's a matter of perspective.
Since you know it's all perspective, is there any reason to raise a giant stink over the internet about it?
This entire thread is accomplishing what?
Without posting around what I'm asking, just riddle me this:
What are your brash comments accomplishing?

Well if you want to quibble over small points, then it's the "joke you're defending" and not "your" joke. Better now?

Hopefully I'm letting people here know that certain jokes should't be told in "mixed" company, and to think about how they would feel if the show was on the other foot and similar comments were made at their country/family/cultural region's expense.

Overall, this entire argument could have been avoided with a reasonable acknowledgment that maybe the "joke" shouldn't have been told in the first place, especially so soon after the holiday.

[Typhoid]

Well if you want to quibble over small points, then it's the "joke you're defending" and not "your" joke. Better now?

Much.


Hopefully I'm letting people here know that certain jokes should't be told in "mixed" company, and to think about how they would feel if the show was on the other foot and similar comments were made at their country/family/cultural region's expense.

So then we can't post any Canadian, American, European, Female, Male, White, Black, Straight, or Gay jokes?

Hey, did you hear about the dirty horse?


Overall, this entire argument could have been avoided with a reasonable acknowledgment that maybe the "joke" shouldn't have been told in the first place, especially so soon after the holiday.

I don't think any of that has anything to do with it.
It's a holiday for you.
He's not in your country. I didn't even know there was a U.S. holiday now.
Americans know, sure. But other than that, why would anyone else know? Especially overseas.

If jokes constantly have to be reviewed, and looked at because they might insult someone, they stop being jokes. The best thing about a joke, is that it's just a joke. If you do it purposely to prove a point - as you did - and post something of same or greater insulting value, then it's not a joke, because you didn't mean it to be funny. You meant it for another purpose.

Personally, you're just being really oversensative.

[Professor S]

Maybe I am oversensitive to this point, bit the joke is still rude and based an incorrect premise. While my reaction may be exaggerated, that doesn't mean the joke wasn't offensive.

And in the end, thats all I was really trying to point out, but no one wanted to acknowledge the obvious.

[Typhoid]

Maybe I am oversensitive to this point, bit the joke is still rude and based an incorrect premise. While my reaction may be exaggerated, that doesn't mean the joke wasn't offensive.

And in the end, thats all I was really trying to point out, but no one wanted to acknowledge the obvious.


All the best jokes are relatively offensive.
The reason they immediately lose all the offensiveness is because they're jokes.
They're said in jest, not in harm.
And that's where the difference lies.

It doesn't matter how you perceive the joke. If you took it in a bad light, then I guess the best way to say it is - "sucks for you". Jokes a joke.

This thread needs to be closed.

[Professor S]

All the best jokes are relatively offensive.
The reason they immediately lose all the offensiveness is because they're jokes.
They're said in jest, not in harm.
And that's where the difference lies.

It doesn't matter how you perceive the joke. If you took it in a bad light, then I guess the best way to say it is - "sucks for you". Jokes a joke.

This thread needs to be closed.

By the logic you've expressed here, a racist joke wouldn't be offensive because it was intended as joke. That makes no sense at all.

[Typhoid]

I stick by my "a joke is a joke".

That's not saying you can't take something harmless and turn it terrible.
Racist jokes are funny. They're terrible most of the time, but that's mostly why they're funny. They play off of completely un-true stereotypes.

When someone uses a racist joke as an insult, or in an insulting way, then yes - you're correct, it would be deemed racist.

But that's beside the point.